Thursday night the house was filled with people. Twin B was on the computer in the loft. Evie had returned with her boyfriend to get her things. She is staying with her boyfriend and his mom now. She could not be around Billy while she was not clean. Billy was smoking a cigarette in the garage when Ron, Evie's boyfriend told me Billy showed Evie the Vicodines.
Billy's purse was next to me on the table, I searched it and found a pill in the outside pocket. I have taken enough Vicodines to know the markings. Once Evie and Ron left I had confronted Kevin and Billy about their day.
"Is she supposed to have these?" I shouted at Kevin, holding the Vicodine in my hand.
"I thought it was the lesser of two evils," he replies.
"You sit her talking about getting her a job as a bank teller and her having to pass a drug test and you give her these?"
I turned to Billy, "You can't stay here. You broke our agreement and I am having your mother turn off your phone."
We exchange a few loud words before Billy heads upstairs to pack. I tell Kevin he is not helping, he should leave. He doesn't he has a thing for Billy, she is using it to control him. Billy comes down stairs, "Did you take my phone?"
"I don't have too." I call her mother and tell her to have it disconnected.
Billy takes my phone from me and starts trying to manipulate her mother, "Mom, if you take my phone away you will not be able to contact me." Her mother stands firm.
Billy leaves the house with her suitcase rolling behind her. I don't know how far she got or if she just waited nearby for Kevin. Kevin wanted to make sure she had somewhere to go. I gave him the address of the Rehab clinic but he took her home instead.
Kevin promised me he would not enable her in anyway and he did spend the next day taking her around to doctors, finally getting her to see an addictionologist. She has been with him for two days now. It seems to be a good place for her right now. Kevin's feeling for her seem to keep him in check. Billy seems to trust him enough to allow him to help her.
She wants to come home. I'm not sure if she's ready. She has an appointment with a therapist and has agreed to start meetings. Rehab does not seem to work for her, getting clean is not the problem. Wanting to stay clean seems to be. I do not know what goes on inside her head. She is more silent than I.
I know about addiction in one aspect, but its not drugs. She has to really want it. REALLY REALLY want to change to stick with it. Is there an average time that she stays clean before she starts using again? That would be interesting to know if there is a certain amount of time that triggers her, those would be the days to watch her like a hawk, have her attend meetings and go to therapy.
ReplyDeleteif she doesn't WANT to stay clean, nothing and no one will really help her. No matter what you say or do, she'll probably have to hit another bottom till she wants to stay clan. (I've learnt this the hard way...)
ReplyDeleteI don't think it is a matter of wanting to remain clean. She has issues, she is in emotional pain that she has never dealt with. She may not want to face these problems, because they are to painful. Thus the drugs. She has to be in a full on locked down rehab facility. They won't allow her to get away with bullshit. I am not saying you did, but she has to go to rehab for at least 60 days, and get intensive therapy to learn how to deal with her pain.
ReplyDeleteDanielle- I agree, I need to know her triggers. Billy is back phone, she came home last night.
ReplyDeleteMisery- I am not so sure, I don't know what to believe she didn't do heroin, she is trying to clean up.
klynne- The traditional rehab does not work for her, she is a smart girl too smart for a lot of those programs. She does have underlying issues, she knows this and is going to be seeing a therapist to deal with those.